The fear of ambiguity, the fear of the unknown
Eating away at the roots, leaves the heart rotting.
Like an impending death sentence, it crawls
Stealthily, constantly; seeps into the blood.

There is finally a weariness, a slump
The vision is blurred, is distorted.
The feet have lost their vigour, their drive.
The eyes have lost their shine, their hope.

There is now a darkness, a sadness
The flame of life is extinguished, is exhausted.
The face has lost its innocence, its smile.
The hands have lost their power, their stride.

I seek you, more than I have ever before
To come and rejuvenate me, save me.
These cold steel chains grasp me, enslave me
I want you to look me in the eye, into my soul.

Away, I sail far away from you
To a world free from your memories.
To a land of discovery, of excitement
To an ocean of infinite opportunities.

Away, I move far away from myself
To freedom from my own ideas, thoughts.
To a river, moving furiously forth ahead.
To a dream, where everything is new.

Away, I am swept away from life.
From everything I ever knew existed.
From everything I believed was true.
And from the person you made me be.

Can't live with, can't live without

With you, my wings are clipped.
My head hung with humility, shame.
My feet heavy with broken promises,
My mind lost, in pursuit of freedom.

Without you, my body is without soul.
Everything is without joy; is colourless.
The days are longer, nights lonelier.
As if the world has come to a halt.

And here I am, stuck between the two.
Not knowing where to go, what to do.
But the one thing I keep is the love
It enlivens me, with or without you.

पुकार

आज िदल िफर घबरा उठा
खोजने लगा वही चेहरे
जो एक याद बन चुके थे
जो िज़दगी छोड़ चुके थे ।

सब छोड़ के लौटना तो चाहा
लेिकन िफर याद आया िक
बहुत आगे आ चुके है हम
उनसे दूर जा चुके है हम ।

आज न है वह शीतल स्पर्श
न रही वह मीठी टकरार।
रह गई बस यादें कई
और यह नम आँखे ।

The Quiet River

On this quiet riverside I sit; wishing
That my life was different; hoping
That there was someone to save me
To give me warmth on a cold night.

As the river moves on a path well known,
I yearn for someone to hold my hand.
Someone to save me from the biting cold
Someone to touch me, and save my soul.

Someone to fight for me, cry for me
Laugh with me, get pointlessly angry at me.
Someone for whom I could leave the world
Someone who would make me forget.

My heart bleeds, the cuts are deep.
But perhaps this punishment is just.
Perhaps it's the best - for you and me
Perhaps ... Perhaps I still love you.

This silence makes me hear
The blood flowing in my veins,
The air, in and out of my lungs,
Even the motion of my hands.

On one hand, I feel trepidation.
Fear of not having anyone around.
Fear of passing days in solitude,
Fear of  letting things die within.

And then I think, what is this for?
Were people mere distractions?
Was this a stage; a hobby to kill time?
Why do I fear being with myself?

I have no answers as I think today.
One day, perhaps, I shall have them.
I want to live life free of fears,
To be alone is the biggest of them.

A broken glass; broken man inside
His skin sagging from years of toil
A frown, due to life's difficult ride
Waiting blithely for the next tide.

A tide to wash away memories,
Another to drag him into the sea.
Where death awaits with open arms
Where depth hides its charms.

Today, the man is dying with hope
Waiting, patiently, for an absolution.
An absolution that is to never come
For the heart isn't yet quite ready.

Not quite ready to move on,
Not ready to forget that moment.
That moment of blood, of pain
Sticks today, an permanent stain.

This silence, it returns, it haunts.
It reflects on the pool of the past.
It travels the hollows of promises,
The shallows of trust, of love.

This silence, my friend of past, today
I stare blankly at its new familiarity.
What had once left me, returns today
A familiar pain emerges in the heart.

The inescapable tragedy of love
Now playing in the theatre of absurd.
Then, there was the shade of dark death
Today I am naked in the snide sun.

I walk away, knowing that you're waiting.
And it probably hurts me more than you.
But my sacrifice today will open the gates
For joys for you; perhaps for me too.

I accept walking in the shadows today,
So that you and only you get the limelight.
I accept being an old, fading star today,
So that your starry journey makes a start.

How much blood my veins carry I don't know,
Don't  know when the dam of patience will break.
I live today, I die, eat, love, hate, pray today.
Tomorrow's sun I despise; it's promises I don't take.